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| Chapter | |
| Optimal Quality of Life Training cccecceereeeeereeees | |
| Persistent Adaptation to Chronic Stress cccseeees | |
| Breathe Deeply Smoothly Slowly and on Long Intervals | |
| Hold a Steady Upward Gaze with Wide Eyes | |
| Recognizing Muscular Tension and Dormant Muscle | |
| Release Tense Muscle with Compression and Massage | |
| Thinking Peacefullly cccccscccssseccssecsseesssseesseeesssaeessaees | |
| Reprogramming Facial Tension ccscccssscssseessteesseees | |
| Compressing Facial Muscles for Composure and Wellbeing | |
| Chapter Perfecting Your Smillecccccccccsscecsseeesseeeesseeesseeeenes | |
| Chapter | |
| Chapter | |
| Chapter | |
| Breathing Less Nasally and without Pharyngeal Tension | |
| Release Vocal Tension ccecceceeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeteeeeneeeae | |
| Reprogram Your Posture for PoWEFC cccscceeseeeereees | |
| Chapter Antirigidity Therapy Bring Dormant Muscle to Fatigue | |
| Chapter | |
| Combine Antirigidity with your Exercise Routine | |
| Chapter Antirigidity Exercises for the Neck and Shoulders | |
| Chapter Antirigidity Exercises for the Lower Back | |
| Chapter Use Proper Posture and Antirigidity While Walking | |
| Chapter | |
| Chapter Healthy Eating Patterns cccccscccssseecssseesseeessees | |
| Chapter | |
| Chapter | |
| Chapter | |
| Stop Sexually Submissive Behavior ccccccecee | |
| Chronic Stress the Amygdala and Cortisol | |
| Listen to Your Heart and Gut cccccccccccceeeseseeeeeeeeseeee | |
| Serotonin Optimism and Cooperation ccccee | |
| Chapter Rise Above Status Conflict ccscccssceessseeesseeeseeeenee | |
| Chapter | |
| Happiness Is Playfulness Composed Kindness | |
| Chapter Conclusions | |
| PROGRAM PEACE Self Care Exercises to Reprogram Your Mind and Body | |
| Indeed human infertility and sexual dysfunction are both known by medical researchers to be | |
| highly exacerbated by the stress hormone cortisol | |
| Chronically elevated cortisol levels can cause loss of libido and impotence in men mostly by | |
| inhibiting the production of testosterone In women it can cause severe fertility problems and | |
| result in an abnormal menstrual cycle This antagonism between the cortisol and testosterone | |
| hormonal axes is thought to be adaptive because in emergency situations engaging in behaviors | |
| that are encouraged by testosterone such as mating competition and dominance is | |
| unnecessary and possibly counterproductive | |
| If you put a mouse in a cage with a more dominant mouse its testosterone and fertility will | |
| decline significantly Similarly if you spend time believing that you are inferior or inadequate | |
| your virility will drop We must avoid sexual bullying and stop ourselves from thinking sexually | |
| selfsubordinating thoughts Fortunately the effects of cortisol on testosterone in both men | |
| and women are reversed when the stress goes back down | |
| You dont want your body to assume you are a pathetic monkey trying to sneak copulations | |
| in hiding So you need to send it the right messages You want to develop a mindset of sexual | |
| dominance and disinhibition affirming that you can achieve arousal at any time have sex | |
| anywhere and be in your sexual comfort zone under any social conditionsas long as it is | |
| ethical and legal of course This starts with slowing everything else down and making your | |
| sexual response a priority Just as subordination causes us to ignore our shallow breathing and | |
| protracted neck it also causes us to ignore both the tension and the pleasure in our genitals | |
| The best way to counteract this is to learn to listen to your genitals | |
| Sexual Exercise Listen to the Sensations Coming from Your Genitals | |
| Your genitals are continuously sending you sensory signals about their current state of | |
| arousal Most of us ignore this steady influx of cues leaving us out of tune with our sexuality | |
| Sexual suppression and submission have turned our erogenous zones into blind spots Feeling | |
| good down there is not a sin not a luxury and not something you have to earn It is your | |
| basic right as a mammal and an integral part of dealing with stress If you want to cultivate | |
| your sexual response you must pay attention to any and all pleasurable sensations coming | |
| from in between your legs | |
| Close your eyes and spend five minutes meditating on this area Focus on it completely like | |
| you are watching a movie At first you may not sense much but with time and patience | |
| you will begin to notice faint instances of erogenous squirming and pulsating Indulge them | |
| Learn to revel in them Doing this will help prove to your body that you are a lusty beast | |
| unencumbered by sexual trauma With time practice and the use of the other exercises in | |
| this chapter infrequent tingles and quivers will turn into a steady stream of notsosubtle | |
| heaving and throbbing Monitor your breath while you do this and imagine breathing | |
| straight into your genitals This will help you develop the laser focus necessary to become | |
| reacquainted with the full extent of your aphrodisia | |
| Chapter Stop Sexually Submissive Behavior | |
| One of the best ways to improve your awareness of sexual sensations is to stop bracing the | |
| muscles involved This is simply because if they are constantly strained they cannot respond | |
| actively to sexual stimuli There is no throbbing in dormant muscle | |
| Stop Bracing the Muscles Surrounding Your Genitals | |
| Hip or pelvic tension can be a conscious or unconscious attempt to downplay the potency of | |
| the genital region and is yet another form of submissive body language Over time the | |
| formation of dormant muscle leads to withered libido lessened enjoyment of sex and sexual | |
| dysfunction There are other sources of pelvic bracing Falling on the bottom bruising the | |
| tailbone long hours sitting at a desk or a bicycle seat and all types of physical trauma can lead | |
| to tension the area | |
| Pelvic bracing is linked to medical disorders Vaginismus is the involuntary contraction of | |
| muscles that surround the vagina The tight muscles make penetration and intercourse painful | |
| for women with this disorder Bracing may also make it harder for some women to orgasm | |
| For a woman to climax the muscles of her pelvic floor cannot be taut They must relax during | |
| sexual stimulation so that they can contract rhythmically during orgasm Many researchers | |
| believe that various sexual disorders such as male impotence latency to female orgasm and | |
| vulvodynia chronic vulvar pain can be due to excessive bracing of muscles adjacent to the | |
| sexual organs This seems even more likely when you consider that common preceding events | |
| for these disorders include sexual assault rape domestic abuse sexual humiliation chronic | |
| pain and generalized anxiety | |
| It is well known that the blood vessels surrounding the external genitalia constrict during | |
| sympathetic stimulation and dilate upon parasympathetic stimulation This means that blood | |
| flow to the penis clitoris and vulva is impeded by stress and accentuated by relaxation In fact | |
| the pelvic floor is one of the most reactive groups of muscles during startle When it contracts it | |
| results in a retraction of the clitoris for women and the penis for men Relaxation of the | |
| anococcygeal area is thought to be key in improving the sexual arousal response As a matter of | |
| fact engorgement of the penis clitoris and labia results from the relaxation of smooth muscle | |
| In other words blood doesnt flow until these unconsciously regulated muscles loosen up | |
| Sexual Activity Brace and Debrace Your Pelvic Muscles | |
| How do stress and intimidation affect the bracing of the muscles around your genitals Most | |
| people could not answer this because they have little to no awareness of this common | |
| reaction Lets try bracing them to see how it feels Tighten the muscles in your lower back | |
| Tilt your hips to one side and brace them Squeeze your legs together Tighten your urinary | |
| sphincter as if you were trying to stop yourself from peeing Now contract all these muscles | |
| and anything else local you can find at of their maximum strength After seconds | |
| let go entirely and register what it feels like to let the bracing here subside Repeat this | |
| contraction and relaxation four more times | |
| We signal sexual submission by straining sexrelated muscles in the abdomen and pelvis | |
| These muscles lose their healthy tone after sexual trauma or feelings of sexual inferiority | |
| Thankfully like all muscles you can rehabilitate them Most people have an untapped reservoir | |
| PROGRAM PEACE Self Care Exercises to Reprogram Your Mind and Body | |
| of muscle in the groin that has atrophied The next two sections will show you how to exercise | |
| and strengthen it believe proper tone in these muscles allows the genitals increased vascular | |
| blood flow vasocongestion increases the prominence of arousal and heightens the | |
| accompanying sensations | |
| Exercise Your Urine Retentive Muscles | |
| You have numerous muscles situated between your sitz bones pubic bone and coccyx These | |
| muscles support the pelvic organs contract during orgasm aid in childbirth and ejaculation | |
| and provide core stability | |
| Abdominal | |
| Muscle | |
| Rectum | |
| Coccyx Pubic Bone | |
| Bladder | |
| Urethra | |
| Anus | |
| Pelvic Floor Vagina | |
| Muscles | |
| Illustration A Side view of female reproductive anatomy Note the location of the pelvic floor muscles | |
| stretching from the pubic bone to the tail bone coccyx B Frontal view of the pelvic floor musculature which is | |
| similar in women and men Several pelvic muscles are depicted including the ischiocavernosus bulbospongiosus | |
| coccygeus pubococcygeus the urogenital diaphragm and others | |
| In the s Dr Arnold Kegel taught people how to strengthen the perineum the area | |
| between the anus and the genitals He knew that these muscles are often injured in women | |
| during childbirth and he instructed women how to contract them reinstating their strength | |
| in an exercise that came to be known as Kegels Doctors have prescribed Kegels for many | |
| reasons including treating urinary incontinence ameliorating erectile dysfunction and | |
| controlling premature ejaculation Kegels are taught by having the patient repeatedly interrupt | |
| their urinary flow Dr Kegel recommended urinating a spoonful at a time Try this in the | |
| activity below | |
| Sexual Activity Contracting the Urinary Sphincter | |
| The next time you find yourself peeing stop urinating midstream Once you can stop the flow | |
| completely you have found the right muscles Try urinating for only a second at a time until | |
| you have voided your bladder Focus on tightening only the pelvic floor muscles keeping the | |
| abdomen thighs anus and buttocks relaxed This will allow you to isolate the contraction | |
| Doing this several times will help you identify the muscles and gain conscious control of | |
| them At that point you should do this exercise without urinating and from any position | |
| you want | |
| Chapter Stop Sexually Submissive Behavior | |
| Most of us learned to brace the Kegel muscles intensely as young children when | |
| holding it for long periods to avoid the embarrassing experience of urinating in public | |
| Can you remember an incident in which this muscle was likely traumatized by being braced | |
| heavily during the traumatic scenario of trying desperately to find a bathroom as a child | |
| Not only do the muscles surrounding the genitals seize up in these scenarios but distressed | |
| breathing predominates making the strain worse Most people have a strong tendency to hold | |
| their breath when performing Kegels and of course this defeats the purpose Therefore | |
| recommend pairing Kegels with paced breathing | |
| Sexual Exercise Diaphragmatic Kegels | |
| Perform hard Kegel contractions as if you were interrupting the stream of urine Do this while | |
| paced breathing This will build your capacity to activate the pelvic floor muscles without | |
| holding your breath Hold a forceful contraction during a second passive exhalation and | |
| then relax for a few breaths Do this times in a row You might also try performing rapid | |
| Kegels ie one to three per second for a minute | |
| These muscles contract involuntarily during arousal and orgasm So loosening them up and | |
| developing their responsivity may enliven your sex life Also after developing the muscular | |
| strength that comes from pelvic floor exercises men can perform a Kegel at orgasm to | |
| withhold ejaculation effectively allowing them to experience multiple orgasms also believe | |
| that strengthening and unbracing these muscles can facilitate female ejaculation and | |
| squirting | |
| The next section will provide you with an exercise that will dilate these areas rather than | |
| constrict them In a previous chapter we learned how important it is to perform forward bends | |
| after backward bends to neutralize the spine believe that performing Kegels without | |
| exercising the antagonist muscles leads to similar imbalances For example there is evidence | |
| that performing Kegels can lead to incomplete emptying of the bladder and this is a risk factor | |
| for urinary tract infection and other maladies As you might have guessed the counterpose for | |
| a Kegel is complete bladder emptying | |
| Exercise the Muscles that Expel Urine | |
| Interestingly the Kegel contraction is braced involuntarily during social competition | |
| Kegels result in a retraction of the clitoris penis and testicles potentially making them less | |
| conspicuous to a competitor believe that in this they are submissive and intended to hide | |
| the genitalia It is like the sea slug withdrawing its gill or the snail withdrawing its eyestalk | |
| Male monkeys and apes are frequently observed hiding their erections from other males | |
| especially from males above them in the hierarchy They dont want to be attacked for being | |
| aroused This is why think genital retraction due to chronic Kegel contraction is an innate | |
| defense mechanism protecting subordinates from sexually dominant individuals It is yet | |
| another display equivalent to a collapsed posture believe that losing tone and developing | |
| partial contraction in the pelvic region is a selfhandicapping mechanism that assumes | |
| advertising ones level of sexual arousal is dangerous | |
| PROGRAM PEACE Self Care Exercises to Reprogram Your Mind and Body | |
| If you have balanced tone in your pelvic muscles your flaccid penis or clitoris will increase | |
| and decrease in size with your arousal level If you have strain or poor tone the flaccid organ | |
| may remain at its smallest possible size until full arousal is reached Most people are aware that | |
| the penis and clitoris shrink in size when exposed to cold In fact penile length decreases by up | |
| to in the defensive response to low temperature believe men with a history of chronic | |
| intimidation and sexual subordination are more likely to exhibit this kind of shrinkage when | |
| flaccid This likely corresponds to the grower vs shower dichotomy referenced in popular | |
| culture The growers may be men with a more extensive history of being sexually intimidated | |
| This may be reversible by performing the opposite of the Kegel | |
| It is easy for both women and men to pinpoint the muscles that expel urine They speed up | |
| the stream These muscles include the lower abdominal muscles and the bladder detrusor | |
| muscle They aid in the expulsion of urine by increasing the pressure applied to the bladder | |
| wall The stream of urine will cease when the bladder has been voided but the muscles | |
| themselves can still be contracted If you continue to squeeze the expulsive muscles very firmly | |
| after you finish urinating you will realize you can flex these muscles through their full range | |
| Most people never use this full range creating a missing corner of dormant muscle | |
| Thus it is also a reservoir that you can tap into and rehab Think of the exercise as an | |
| antikegel As we have seen in previous chapters sometimes the only way to free muscles | |
| from partial contraction is through hard full contractions | |
| Sexual Exercise Contract the Expulsive Muscles | |
| The next time you urinate try to expel the urine more forcefully than usual Steadily increase | |
| the force as you empty your bladder As it nears empty do not let up Instead squeeze the | |
| related muscles hard even after the stream stops Notice the posture that your lower back | |
| and lower abdomen have taken on and remember the feeling of contracting this muscle so | |
| that you can do it later After you have emptied your bladder continue to squeeze the | |
| muscle at to maximum force for an additional seconds It may ache tenderly | |
| but performing this exercise each time you urinate will make this aching disappear within a | |
| matter of days | |
| Start practicing it away from the toilet as well You should feel comfortable performing the | |
| Kegel and antiKegel contractions in the presence of others There is no reason to brace or | |
| selflimit your pelvic range just because other people are around To really stimulate these | |
| erogenous areas and all the tissues and blood vessels involved you can also try gently | |
| performing Kegels and antiKegels while you have an erection whether clitoral or penile | |
| Together these exercises will help put an end to neurotic pelvic flinching and straining | |
| Urine Expulsion as a Posture and Mindset | |
| You want to incorporate proper tone in these urineexpelling muscles into your daily standing | |
| walking and sitting postures The muscles involved include the lower abdominals so imagine | |
| being able to take a small punch to the lowest segment of your abs at any time This means you | |
| need to practice walking around with your lower abs engaged as if you were peeing want to | |
| Chapter Stop Sexually Submissive Behavior | |
| encourage you to walk jog exercise and socialize as if you are dribbling urine everywhere | |
| you go | |
| Listen intently to the sensations involved It should feel pleasurable Imagine spurting | |
| rainbows and gushing warm velvet from your urethra onto everything in front of you | |
| Experience everything orgasmically This should be happening as you look at yourself in the | |
| mirror as you walk around the block and as you squeeze in that last repetition while | |
| exercising Imagine that your genitals are permanently everted rather than inverted As you | |
| strengthen the retentive and expulsive muscles muscle memory will develop and they | |
| will come to hold balanced tone automatically believe this is highly beneficial for | |
| psychosexual health | |
| suppressed these muscles during my lifetime through acquiescent selfhandicapping | |
| behavior have always been averse to dirty jokes and overt sex play which may have led to | |
| less sexualized perineal posture growing up believe that unconsciously allowed my Kegel | |
| muscles to strain and my expulsive muscles to atrophy because was sexually repressive and | |
| analretentive Again the expulsive urinary and anal sphincter muscles work antagonistically | |
| with the retentive muscles meaning that expulsive qualities may be especially weak in | |
| retentive people If you think that you may be analretentive you are probably also urinary | |
| retentive While we are talking about poop please ask yourself whether combining distressed | |
| breathing while straining on the toilet seat during defecation may have traumatized your anal | |
| muscles If so you might consider using paced breathing while defecating when constipated | |
| and while contracting the anal retentive and expulsive muscles | |
| Strengthening the muscles involved in expelling urine will make your behavior more | |
| assertive Activity and tone in this area are associated with approach and the seizing of | |
| opportunities that are both sexual and nonsexual in nature It is difficult to maintain a | |
| dominant selfassured demeanor if the tone in the expulsive muscles is low You have probably | |
| noticed that worry or sudden fear makes your retentive muscles tense and the expulsive ones | |
| limp Similarly encountering something sharp or experiencing fear of heights does this as well | |
| For example peering over the ledge from the Sth floor of a parking structure can make your | |
| whole pelvis seize up This happens immediately and involuntarily during startle and fright | |
| Your pelvic floor recoils from threat | |
| When you take an ego blow or get upset or flustered the muscles that expel urine similarly | |
| drop out of flexion If your machismo is questioned but you have the gumption to reassert | |
| yourself you might notice the activity waiver and come back Activity here shrivels up when | |
| people get their balls busted For many depressed and anxious people these muscles drop | |
| out of tonicity during social encounters For sexually assertive people the expulsive | |
| musculature develops a stronger tone when around others they find attractive For sexually | |
| withdrawn people the tone may actually decrease in these situations Losing tone and | |
| accumulating strain in these muscles leads to emasculation andor defeminization | |
| When first started to engage the muscles that expel urine would become afraid of | |
| upsetting the bully introduced in Chapter realized that was afraid to engage the muscles | |
| even when he was not around When tried thoughts visuals and a feeling of being in the | |
| bullys presence would intrude into my mind unconsciously It took me some time to realize | |
| that was bracing these muscles in a restricted range out of fear of offending the bully | |
| This bully was muscular highly charismatic a felon and a murderer On one occasion had | |
| PROGRAM PEACE Self Care Exercises to Reprogram Your Mind and Body | |
| seen him continue to make fun of and laugh at someone even after that person pulled a gun on | |
| him As many bullies do he would frequently tell sexually explicit stories describing his sexual | |
| prowess in attempts to intimidate other men This is one of the fundamental forms that sexual | |
| toxicity takes | |
| The man had acquired pseudopsychopathy meaning he had developed criminal | |
| antisocial and hypersexual personality traits after severe brain trauma He was catastrophically | |
| disinhibited after being fully ejected headfirst through the windshields of two cars he stole on | |
| separate occasions was subverting my sexuality in an attempt to appease this man Simply | |
| becoming explicitly aware of this subversion was enough to end it After bringing peace to this | |
| context realized that there were additional contexts that caused me to brace my genital | |
| musculature What contexts of intimidation sting you in the genitals and keep you stuck ina | |
| partially contracted Kegel Dont let anyone keep you in a retentive state in which the genitals | |
| are retracted or keep you from contracting your expulsive muscles Rather than being held taut | |
| in a restricted range these muscles should fluctuate naturally between the two extremes of | |
| retention and expulsion as you go about your day | |
| Once you become comfortable fully contracting the muscles that withhold and expel urine | |
| you should notice them quiver involuntarily more frequently Toning the muscles and stretching | |
| them out of partial contraction will increase the range of motion of your orgasms You may also | |
| notice that you experience increased blood flow and heightened turgidity in your genitals This | |
| suggests to me that formal physical therapy centered around exercising these muscles could | |
| treat both diminished sex drive and erectile dysfunction However most medical experts on the | |
| topic assume that these muscles operate autonomously and neednt be exercised | |
| This medical opinion is at odds with Ayurvedic medicine and tantric Hinduism which | |
| recognize the base of the spine as a chakra It is called muladhara the root chakra and | |
| kundalini yoga emphasizes that it must be used and meditated upon Additionally some | |
| Japanese Zen meditation practices emphasize the lower abdominal area dantian or tanden as | |
| a focal point for meditation believe the exercises in this chapter can guide you to exert | |
| control over and rehabilitate these foci | |
| At one point realized lacked the coordination to contract my urinary expulsive muscles | |
| and gluteus muscles simultaneously When tried held my breath Many people have this | |
| functional dissociation When these are dissociated you are limited to either doing one or the | |
| other However it is easy to fix Proper core stability demands that you be able to contract | |
| these muscles together actively Everyone should teach their body to activate both the urinary | |
| and fecal expulsive muscles while simultaneously contracting their buttocks | |
| Sexual Activity Pairing Expulsive Tone with Gluteal Tone | |
| Stand with optimal posture as described in Chapter With your feet parallel and the top | |
| of your hips rolled backward contract the gluteus muscles Now contract either your urinary | |
| or fecal expulsive muscles as if you were trying to pee or defecate Now try all three together | |
| Spend time in this zone varying these contractions to different degrees while engaging in | |
| calm paced breathing | |
| Chapter Stop Sexually Submissive Behavior | |
| As with many other examples in the Program Peace system if holding two dominant | |
| displays simultaneously is uncomfortable or difficult they likely inhibit each other However | |
| if you can calmly practice them together you disinhibit them and increase the probability they | |
| will arise together on their own | |
| Walk Confidently as if Your Genitals Were on Display | |
| In Chapter we discussed how submissive animals minimize the appearance of physical assets | |
| like horns claws and muscles This includes the genitals Your everyday posture and | |
| mannerisms reveal cues to others as to how comfortable you are naked Body language evolved | |
| during our history as unclothed apes so even clothed we often act as if we were naked Most | |
| people conceal their genitals during times of insecurity with their hands legs chairs or tables | |
| When a dominant person makes a power play it is quite common for other people of the same | |
| sex to place their hands in front of their sex organs The only time you should conceal or protect | |
| the genitals is to block a physical blow to the groin | |
| Most people walk in a way that hides or apologizes for their genitalia Walking like this | |
| involves hunching or crouching of the lower back Remember the lumbar lordosis and anterior | |
| pelvic tilt discussed in previous chapters We actually use these to withdraw our private parts | |
| from view They obscure the genitals like a dog hiding its tail between its legs You should do | |
| the exact opposite This means walking around with the back and hips open as if presenting the | |
| genitalia To do this flex your buttocks Thats right gluteal contraction puts your genitals on | |
| display by pressing your hips forward and rolling the top of your pelvis back as discussed in | |
| Chapter It is an entirely different style of standing and walking that comes across as much | |
| more sexually selfassured | |
| If you can imagine being comfortably naked in social situations you will project higher | |
| confidence The more time you spend naked the more comfortable it will become which is | |
| why strongly recommend sleeping naked when possible If you have never slept naked you | |
| may lose some sleep the first night because of how uncomfortable you feel But you will relax | |
| into it within a week also recommend spending time alone in your room in the buff as | |
| described next | |
| Sexual Activity Spend an Hour in Your Room Naked | |
| Make sure no one can see into your room and you wont be disturbed Lock the door | |
| Completely disrobe Place towels underneath you if uncomfortable sitting on the floor naked | |
| Spend a full hour reading watching TV meditating whatever you want completely naked It | |
| can help to have a mirror in front of you Use optimal posture Once you become | |
| comfortable try talking on the phone How do you hold your body when completely nude | |
| Do you tend to cover up or hide your genitalia Is your posture retentive or expulsive Notice | |
| these tendencies change as you become comfortable Experiment with pushing your pelvis | |
| out contracting your glutes and spreading your legs in different ways If performed with | |
| paced breathing this activity will transform your relationship with your birthday suit | |
| PROGRAM PEACE Self Care Exercises to Reprogram Your Mind and Body | |
| Masturbation Trauma | |
| Most of us were petitioned by our parents at a very young age to stop touching our genitals in | |
| the company of others We learned to feel bad for stimulating the area resulting in a subtle | |
| form of trauma recommend briefly touching yourself in a sexualaffectionate way at least five | |
| times a day This can be a graze stroke or reassuring grope Some people already do this | |
| regularly To others it is very foreign You can do it alone or discretely in public Even a second | |
| of selfcomforting can help decrease bracing of the pelvic floor | |
| used to worry that frequent masturbation could cause specific forms of cancer until used | |
| pubmedcom to look at the actual medical studies It does not There are no diseases linked to | |
| masturbation So give yourself carte blanche to be completely selfindulgent However there | |
| are a few important caveats to keep in mind Masturbating to pornography may desensitize you | |
| to real people potentially leading to sexual dysfunction Also masturbating with a lubricant can | |
| make it difficult for men to sustain an erection with a condom Also consider masturbating | |
| while standing up to avoid losing the ability to remain aroused while standing Definitely | |
| consider masturbating while paced breathing For some people it takes time and work merely | |
| to reach arousal while paced breathing But the process will steel and gird your sexuality | |
| Studies have shown that placing tiny vibrators near or on the genitals of mice can increase | |
| sexual response interest and the production of sex hormones Studies like these suggest that | |
| the external use of vibrators may convince the mammalian body that it resides in some kind of | |
| maximally optimal sexual environment and may in turn elicit an optimal sexual response from it | |
| involving changes in gene expression Keep in mind though that masturbating to orgasm with | |
| some sex toys may make it difficult to sustain arousal during regular intercourse | |
| The fascia and muscles nestled in the pelvis control the responsivity of sexual arousal | |
| Massage and myofascial release are probably beneficial for these muscles however there is no | |
| existing rubric to help people do this safely and effectively Moreover excessive pressure could | |
| damage your sexual organs or drastically change the tone of the muscles that regulate blood | |
| flow to them For these reasons will not describe a protocol for genital massage here If you | |
| decide to use compressive massage on the areas between your legs recommend using only | |
| very light pressure That being said you should also find that groin stretching and antirigidity | |
| can be helpful in conditioning these muscles | |
| Sexual Expressivity | |
| The antirigidity exercises for the lumbar spine from Chapter will help free up your hips and | |
| lower back making your sexual expressivity more sensual and enjoyable Try to incorporate | |
| previously dormant muscles into intercourse and use them to explore new movement patterns | |
| Use the next two activities to enhance the coordination of the muscles and joints involved | |
| Sexual Activity Bump Your Pubis Against the Wall | |
| Find some privacy and turn on some sexy music Stand with your feet shoulderwidth apart | |
| and your toes touching a wall Press your pubic bone into the wall to the beat of the music | |
| You can bump against it like a bouncing basketball or smear yourself into it with each thrust | |
| Contract your buttocks firmly as you advance Vary the curvature of your lower back the | |
| distance between your feet and the placement of each blow against the wall | |
| Chapter Stop Sexually Submissive Behavior | |
| After a few sessions you will develop the coordination to turn it into a dance You can move | |
| each advance from left to right or from top to bottom Doing this against a door jamb can | |
| give you the leg room you need to bend your knees and drop lower You can also try this | |
| exercise by bumping your butt against the wall instead of your pubis Bang everything from | |
| your pubic bone to your hips your sacrum to your sitz bones into the brick wood or plaster | |
| Focus on rhythm timing and bravado | |
| Good sex should provide a massage to the pubic bone and the muscles that surround it | |
| for both partners The friction between your pubic hair and your partners should make | |
| rhythmic crackling sounds Pubicboneonpubicbone massage increases arousal and is one of | |
| the best ways to stimulate the clitoris Just like the muscles in our lower backs muscles that | |
| surround the pubic bone can take the form of tense cords that form tense cords Teaching | |
| yourself to massage them during the act of sex along with those of the other person can be | |
| very sexually empowering | |
| Sexual Activity Hump Your Pillows to Music | |
| Put on some music or a music video Stack pillows on your bed to support your pelvis in | |
| different sexual positions You can straddle these pillows kneel squat or lie on top of them | |
| You can also fold a pillow over a couple of times to | |
| Chapter Finding Happiness Through Playfulness Composed Kindness | |
| It can be freeing to be mellow and passive and to support the leadership of others | |
| Allow other people to take over and yourself to relax when they do Relish the relief from being | |
| in charge Do so while exuding balanced nonconfrontational energy Perpetual assertion takes | |
| its toll It involves intense face time eye contact talking decision making and an overtaxing of | |
| existing bracing patterns It leads to social fatigue and is why highpressure executives and CEOs | |
| can age so rapidly We should be handing over the pack leader role constantly passing it | |
| around from person to person sharing the stage the crown and the accompanying burdens | |
| Often in real life we are forced to play an inferior role At our workplace we must submit | |
| to higherups to keep our jobs and advance our careers There are many reasons you should | |
| treat your boss as the dominant individual Whats more it may be best for you your boss and | |
| the business to allow them to act superior in some ways That said dont hurt yourself just to | |
| let the boss be the boss Acquiesce appropriately to your employer law enforcement judges | |
| and other authority figures without diminishing your posture shortening your breath or | |
| surrendering your pride This will allow you to maintain a healthy serotonin level regardless of | |
| your place on the corporate ladder | |
| Just because you dont try to stop someone from acting dominant doesnt mean they are | |
| dominating you They are only dominating you if you are inhibiting yourself or avoiding | |
| confrontation with them out of fear They can never dominate you as long as you stay | |
| composed Take sovereignty from needless oneupmanship | |
| Keep in mind that everyone has essential observations and keen insights to impart | |
| All humans are our fellows and our equals As Ralph Waldo Emerson said Every man meet is | |
| in some way my superior So let every man and woman be your superior at times especially | |
| when they have something to teach you When you see someone do better than you at | |
| something you value dont feel envious or threatened Instead feel eager to learn This is ego | |
| stability and emotional strength | |
| When threatened by an intruder a dominant gorilla will let out a tremendous roar charge | |
| and knock down the newcomer with an immense hand swipe However outside of defending | |
| themselves and their group members dominant gorillas do not generally overtly assert their | |
| rank Even though gorillas are immense powerhouses animal behaviorists often describe them | |
| as shy because most of the time they dont feel like they have anything to prove It is not that | |
| they are shy it is that we are arrogant pompous and flagrantly adversarial | |
| The only way to transcend the dominance hierarchy is to be content when you temporarily | |
| find yourself in a subordinate position to be comfortable when others perceive you as | |
| subordinate without trying to change their mind You dont want to be a doormat but neither | |
| do you want to be consumed by resisting looking like a doormat Only doormats worry about | |
| being doormats | |
| Our unconscious mind values prestige over happiness The two are often at odds You can | |
| change this by intentionally pursuing happiness over prestige | |
| Optimism Excitement and Feeling Good | |
| It pays to be happy Optimists live longer have stronger immune systems recover from injury | |
| more quickly and have increased mental and physical health Happiness and positive emotions | |
| are linked to higher earnings better appraisal at work relationships of higher quality and | |
| increased likability Happy people are perceived as more intelligent competent and physically | |
| PROGRAM PEACE Self Care Exercises to Reprogram Your Mind and Body | |
| attractive Optimists cope more effectively with stress are generally healthier and are less | |
| likely to become depressed When optimists have coronary bypass surgery they heal more | |
| quickly than pessimists Positive thinking results in a cardiovascular system that is less reactive | |
| to stress But how do we become happy in the first place | |
| Optimists attribute the cause of adverse events to external specific and transient factors | |
| In other words they see a tragedy as a oneoff fluke Pessimists on the other hand attribute | |
| failures to their own internal global and permanent shortcomings They see themselves as | |
| useless and assume the world is out to get them If this is you stop it Regain your optimism by | |
| recognizing that you have the potential to fix anything and everything that has ever been wrong | |
| with your life Recognize that the future you will be skilled and competent enough to solve | |
| any problems that arise | |
| We are constantly making expressions to ourselves as we go about our days alone | |
| Whatever these expressions are they constitute our true selves For most people its wincing | |
| If thats you make the gestures and facial expressions of happiness when you are by yourself | |
| The smiling and the postural alterations from previous chapters will help with this If solitary | |
| happiness is not practiced regularly attempts at appearing happy among others will be fake | |
| Remember how excited you could become as a child You had no reservations about expressing | |
| exuberance and enthusiasm Nothing is stopping you from feeling zestfully happy right now | |
| aside from the force of habit | |
| have spent much of this book describing how we use our bodily energy to traumatize our | |
| tissues This might make you assume that our life force is destructive It is not You must | |
| redirect that same life force away from anxiety and tension toward happiness and joy The | |
| more you do this the less energy there is to sustain stress Doing so actively reprograms how | |
| your body routes energy setting you up for hardwired happiness Accordingly all the exercises | |
| in this book should be done with joy and optimistic expectations This will make them much | |
| more powerful | |
| Be a lifeless corpse when it comes to tension ego and pessimism When it comes to | |
| playfulness however thats when you want to be alive and spend your chilike energy on | |
| positive social displays Lets start with laughter | |
| Laughter in Other Animals | |
| Many mammals laugh For example most rodents emit long ultrasonic vocalizations during | |
| rough and tumble play The sounds rats and mice make have been described as chirping and | |
| occur in the kHz range inaudible to humans When chirping they actively seek being | |
| tickled and played with They chirp when wrestling chasing or searching for one another | |
| They chirp during courting and before copulation Researchers have interpreted rat chirping as | |
| an expectation of something rewarding and it appears to elicit friendly social approach in other | |
| members of their species It also nullifies anxiety If you tickle a rat after a fearful situation | |
| it will neutralize the negative emotions and vastly decrease any fearrelated learning going on | |
| in its brain | |
| Dogs can pant using heavy forced exhalations in a way that suggests a form of modified | |
| laughter They use it during play Dogs exposed to a recorded doglaugh exhibit significantly | |
| reduced stress behaviors increased tail wagging the display of the canine playface as well | |
| as prosocial behavior such as approaching and licking another dogs lips | |
| Chapter Finding Happiness Through Playfulness Composed Kindness | |
| Chimps gorillas and orangutans all exhibit laughterlike vocalizations in response to | |
| physical play including friendly contact like chasing wrestling and tickling It is a shallow pant | |
| conveying nonaggression that is highly reminiscent of suppressed laughter in humans Their | |
| laughter shows the same sonographic pattern as that of human babies They also use similar | |
| facial expressions while laughing and are ticklish in the same areas that humans are Ape | |
| laughter consists of a series of exhalations and inhalations like panting On the other hand | |
| human laughter consists of a series of exhalations with no intervening inhalations | |
| Mice dogs apes and humans make their breath shallow to create rapport Insistence on | |
| breathing at long intervals caused me to stop doing this was so focused on diaphragmatic | |
| breathing that refused to breathe shallowly even when joking with friends This is like refusing | |
| to make anything other than an expressionless face Think of shallow breathing during fun | |
| jovial play as a form of healthy panting that serves as a temporary microbreak or counterpose | |
| to diaphragmatic breathing Refusing to pant is refusing to play | |
| Rehabilitating Your Laughter Will Make It Much More Pleasurable | |
| Gelotology is the study of laughter and the positive effects it can have on the body Proponents | |
| advocate the induction of laughter on therapeutic grounds Laughter yoga hasya yoga and | |
| laughter meditation also use voluntary laughter for therapeutic purposes Studies have shown | |
| that it alleviates both stress and pain These practices assume that voluntary or forced | |
| laughter provides some of the same benefits as spontaneous laughter Voluntary laughter is | |
| often done in groups and may turn into real laughter Participants are instructed to facilitate | |
| laughing by using childlike playfulness and eye contact These practices are great but think | |
| they do not get down to the issues crux From what have seen people who engage in this | |
| practice are mostly laughing superficially To reap the benefits we must isolate and strengthen | |
| the core laughing reflex | |
| The muscles involved in laughing have been traumatized by life stress As an infant your | |
| laugh was primordial and bona fide Years of anxious laughter and worrying that your laugh is | |
| too aggressive have damaged your instinctual laughing pattern As you might expect people | |
| who are depressed or anxious have the least convincing laughs Extremely dominant people | |
| laugh loudly without hesitating at whatever they like Most people however stifle their | |
| laughter in the same way they stifle their posture and breathing This explains why most adults | |
| laughter is eccentric and deviated from the innate laughter pattern | |
| A babys laughter is vivacious and natural To relearn to laugh genuinely it is helpful to | |
| watch infants and toddlers laughing Take the time to search for videos of babies laughing | |
| on the internet and mimic them You will see that infants dont stifle their laughter They dont | |
| worry about their laugh being too forceful or about offending someone Neither should we | |
| Your laugh should shake you to your core and be intensely pleasurable | |
| A hearty and progressive emptying of the lungs applies a significant load to the diaphragm | |
| and the muscles of the chest wall triggering the endorphin system This is why social laughter | |
| is correlated with an elevated pain threshold However most adult laughs hardly activate | |
| the pleasure system at all After years of stifling laughter we have forgotten how to laugh in | |
| a way that produces this response For many people the diaphragms role in laughter has | |
| been weakened so much that laughter no longer recruits endorphins and is draining rather | |
| than energizing | |
| PROGRAM PEACE Self Care Exercises to Reprogram Your Mind and Body | |
| Fake or nervous laughter comes from the throat and often results in increased tension | |
| there During natural laughter the diaphragm does most of the work By training yourself | |
| to laugh through deep contractions of the diaphragm and abdominals you can rebuild an | |
| authentic laugh These muscles should reach exhaustion and start to fail during a good laugh | |
| If your diaphragm and abdominals begin to burn like they did when you were a child you know | |
| that you are doing it right The next exercise will show you exactly how to retrain your | |
| diaphragm to fully participate in the act of laughing | |
| Happiness Exercise Diaphragmatic Laughing | |
| Practice laughing while exhaling completely This involves an uninterrupted emptying of the | |
| lungs Inhale completely only after you laughexhale completely Your exhale should consist | |
| of a long series of laughing sounds punctuated by vocal glottal closure haha equals two | |
| glottal closures The brief closing of the vocal tract glottis against the exhalation allows | |
| pressure to build and makes the laugh sound like a series of rapidfire punches They should | |
| roll out somewhat like the Rs when you roll your tongue Practice this as an exercise and | |
| attempt to make the laughter last for at least five seconds but shoot for to seconds | |
| Laugh all the way to the bottom of your range of exhalation Use the principles of anti | |
| rigidity Try the following variations | |
| Focus on and coordinate the laughs glottal closures so that they proceed at a | |
| smooth and steady rate | |
| Notice inadvertent irregularities in timing as well as the tendency to gulp | |
| choke or falter and iron these out Its okay if it sounds mechanical and | |
| robotic at first while you are relearning the basics | |
| Cause the punctuated exhalations to roll out as fast as possible while | |
| maintaining a fixed rhythm After you gain coordination in speeding them up | |
| try slowing them down | |
| Do this using your voice at various pitches but focus most on using a deep | |
| voice to create a deep laugh | |
| Explore your preferred ways of laughing varying resonance inflection and | |
| timing Modulate each in as many ways as possible | |
| Employ different melodies and model other peoples laughs Spend time | |
| listening to and imitating actor Mark Hamills maniacal Joker laugh | |
| Try laughing while exhaling completely until it turns into a wheeze and you | |
| feel you dont have a cubic centimeter of air left in your lungs Ensure that the | |
| laughing pattern remains coordinated even at the bottom of your exhalation | |
| This will greatly strengthen the muscles involved | |
| Dont raise your shoulders when you laugh and focus on keeping them pushed | |
| toward the floor Maintain the tenets of optimal posture Dont allow your | |
| spine to curve into a forward C shape You might try lying on your stomach | |
| while you laugh to ensure that your spine is straight | |
| Do this with a thoroughly relaxed face or while you massage your face so that | |
| you can laugh heartily without intense facial constriction Induce paroxysms of | |
| Chapter Finding Happiness Through Playfulness Composed Kindness | |
| laughter without raising the eyebrows squinting sneering or tensing any | |
| other muscles | |
| The pressure to keep exhaling should be forceful and have a life of its own It | |
| should feel like a boa constrictor is wrapped around your chest squeezing you | |
| hard and only giving you a short period to inhale every few seconds | |
| Laugh authoritatively compellingly boldly forcefully mightily Work on | |
| making it contagious | |
| Because the muscles are strained stagnant and uncoordinated your laugh may sound like | |
| that of an insane villain at first But with practice it will become friendly and ebullient It is | |
| important to do this exercise loudly gleefully and unhesitatingly so make sure that you are not | |
| worried about others hearing you Do it in a closet or better yet in the car | |
| It will be uncomfortable at first The muscles you engage may be so weak that they feel | |
| susceptible to damage Mine certainly were If so take it easy the first few days and build up to | |
| doing it vigorously Use laughter to work out the cramp in your diaphragm This exercise is a | |
| powerful complement to diaphragmatic breathing exercises and will help you reach muscles | |
| that you otherwise could not To this end try it while lying on your stomach from a forward | |
| fold or from happy baby pose with your belly pushed out | |
| At first the laughing exercise should make you feel weary After only one week you will be | |
| able to push harder and be more adept at coordinating the pulses of laughter After a few | |
| weeks you will be good at it and find yourself laughing more often This exercise transformed | |
| my laugh from a flimsy perfunctory courtesy laugh into something enjoyable Now laugh | |
| spontaneously heartily resolutely and much more frequently find laughing tremendously | |
| gratifying and things that were barely amusing to me before are now hilarious | |
| believe that laughing evolved to help humans let off steam It may have allowed instances | |
| of camaraderie and social bonding to influence an individuals life strategy to place less value | |
| on the adaptive aspects of trauma In other words the more conducive your environment is to | |
| laughing the more your body assumes that your environment is a good one and that it is safe | |
| to be optimistic A real laugh was probably designed by evolution to help us attain a fullrange | |
| hard contraction of the diaphragm As with panthooting Exercise this contraction | |
| relieves the diaphragm of the partial contraction caused by stress and shallow breathing | |
| The more you rehabilitate your laugh the more you increase your diaphragms potential | |
| for providing you with endorphins Remember that endorphins are most reliably produced by | |
| grooming singing laughing and play These are addressed in Chapter Chapter this | |
| section and the next section respectively | |
| Some people with relatively calm nasopharynxes can clear their nasopharynx in the same | |
| way others clear their throats It is like snorting except it involves breathing out rather than | |
| breathing in Some people call it a nose laugh see it as a dominance signal conveying that the | |
| persons nasopharynx is not tense When my nasopharynx was tense was incapable of | |
| doing it Once you have compressed your nasopharynx using the exercises in Chapter | |
| you can build the coordination to perform this empowering laugh | |
| Some people use this signal to laugh at something they find inferior like rolling the eyes | |
| Please dont use it derisively or to ridicule people Instead use it as a heartfelt laugh to | |
| PROGRAM PEACE Self Care Exercises to Reprogram Your Mind and Body | |
| communicate that you are enjoying absurdity People usually find it exciting and it makes them | |
| want to laugh along with you | |
| Happiness Exercise Laugh through the Nasopharynx | |
| Use a brief to seconds but powerful exhalation to force air out through your | |
| nasopharynx with the mouth closed This snort is similar to a scoff or chortle It sometimes | |
| arises when you try to withhold laughter First practice doing it in small short bursts to | |
| develop the proper coordination so that you can build up to doing it in a prolonged way | |
| With practice you will be able to hold convincing threesecond nose laughs It is a convivial | |
| way to express amusement that improves quickly with practice | |
| Be Playful | |
| We dont stop playing because we grow old we grow old because we stop playing George Bernard Shaw | |
| Play like laughter is a form of medicine but certain conditions must be met for it to be | |
| genuine All stressors anger fear pain hunger and separation reduce play Animals must be | |
| well fed comfortable and healthy for play to take place When these conditions are met rats | |
| and mice chase and pounce wrestle pin nip poke and knock each other over This is the kind | |
| of play that generates highfrequency laughterlike chirps at kHz Physical roughandtumble | |
| play is the most fun of all At one point thought all aggressive acts were unpleasant but | |
| judging from play in other mammals feigned aggression can be joyous | |
| It is important to note that when mammals play rapid role reversal is a defining element | |
| In other words they know it is friendly when everyone gets a chance to be on top Knowledge | |
| of this should influence us to pass being dominant back and forth with our friends The rat that | |
| ends up on top more often during pins becomes dominant The continuation of play | |
| necessitates a willingness on the part of the winner to selfhandicap Dominant rats that go | |
| easy on others always have playmates but those that bully are ignored when they try to solicit | |
| play Play helps animals determine who to avoid and with whom they can develop cooperative | |
| relationships They learn to dominate but also accept defeat without being defeated | |
| Dominant animals would rather play but aggressive animals would rather fight Rats | |
| involved in a fight bite each other and box This can lead to injury They stand on their hind legs | |
| and strike each other with their front paws When they do this the kHz laughter turns into | |
| kHz complaints This is similar to chimpanzees among whom play is accompanied by | |
| wrestling panting and a play face whereas fighting involves boxing tearing scratching biting | |
| and barking | |
| Chapter Finding Happiness Through Playfulness Composed Kindness | |
| Ilustration Animals playing | |
| Rather than being based around wrestling human play focuses on verbal interchange and | |
| banter Repartee involves provocation rejoinders biting commentary and if friendly laughter | |
| As in other mammals this form of verbal jousting can engender friendship respect and | |
| cooperation It can be made more fun with the use of bombastic quarreling absurd | |
| braggadocio frivolous histrionics grandiose pretentiousness and ostentatious balderdash | |
| When you do it be spunky employ exuberance and enjoy it You dont have to act excitable to | |
| be sparkling and bubbly you just need to be playful Usually if you manage to entertain | |
| yourself others will be entertained as well | |
| Remember to be like the mice during play and allow others their opportunity to be on top | |
| lest you risk losing playmates This includes giving others equal chance to talk and refraining | |
| from dominating conversations A dog initiates play by crouching A monkey initiates it by | |
| exposing its rear end Both of these actions involve selfdiminishment and vulnerability | |
| Showing others that you dont take yourself too seriously or exposing a vulnerability can make | |
| them want to play with you After experimenting with this for years now have concluded that | |
| you can be as vulnerable and nice as you can and as long as you are playful it wont be | |
| mistaken for weakness | |
| Play ranks among the most beneficial neuroplastic interventions Placing rodents into | |
| enriched environments where they can socialize wrestle and play with others results in | |
| heavier brains and higher levels of dopamine endorphins and serotonin Studies have found | |
| that rats deprived of play are more fearful and aggressive toward other rats Encouraging | |
| playfulness in animals is one of the few behavioral interventions known to reverse anxiety and | |
| depressive symptoms This is probably because it allows them to shift from the threat | |
| response to the challenge response | |
| Social play involves creativity and requires that we learn to approach others in diverting | |
| and lively ways Imagination and fantasy can also facilitate play My favorite way to play with | |
| people is to make up imaginary scenarios What would you do if am animated | |
| shameless and immature when doing this My scenarios include helicopters ninjas dinosaurs | |
| and hats with pinwheels on top of them When other people do this recognize it as play | |
| participate and egg them on by laughing with them Whenever someone uses an analogy or | |
| poetic license to describe a situation help them flesh it out until you have created a whimsical | |
| comical cartoon world Feel at home with wordplay punning nonsense and silliness | |
| Use Sensory Deprivation to Unmask Neurotic Activity | |
| Most of us are afraid that fixing our gaze on anything will make us look too calm We keep our | |
| eyes busy to make others feel comfortable Take a minute now and observe yourself looking | |
| around You should be able to sense pressure to keep glancing neurotically This comes froma | |
| form of anxiety in the eye motor centers that act below the level of conscious awareness The | |
| restlessness makes it difficult for you to maintain eye contact and to fixate on anything if other | |
| people are watching you The best way to retrain this nervous habit is to become more | |
| comfortable anchoring your gaze without worrying about how you may appear to others while | |
| doing it | |
| Eye Exercise Sustained Gaze | |
| Spend two minutes staring at a single point Notice any impulses to glance away and gently | |
| override them You might try to keep your eyes fixated on a single feature of the wall or | |
| ceiling or you might try to keep your gaze limited to a circumscribed region of space like a | |
| light fixture If youre having trouble cut out a picture of a face from a magazine and tape it | |
| to your wall or ceiling to gaze at contentedly Allow yourself to feel free to space out like a | |
| child absorbed in a daydream Dont be concerned about looking dazed or stupefied and | |
| dont worry if this level of ocular relaxation causes your eyes to cross for a few moments | |
| Sensory deprivation can help uncover baseline neurotic tendencies Lets start with sight | |
| Tracking your ocular behavior in complete darkness will make it clear how much of your eye | |
| movement is highstrung and unnecessary The best way to do this is to wait until nighttime | |
| turn off all the lights in your home and lie down on the floor of a closet or bathroom Do | |
| whatever you can to make this area completely dark You may need to put up curtains or drape | |
| some towels over the cracks Being in pitch blackness makes it easier to feel absolutely certain | |
| that no one can see your face expressions or eye movements Think back to the way your | |
| submissive signaling diminished when you took that walk around the block while pretending to | |
| be invisible Complete darkness allows you an even greater degree of invisibility and anonymity | |
| No one and nothing can be offended by how relaxed you appear because you truly are invisible | |
| Take the opportunity to relax fully and open your eyes very wide without compunction | |
| In absolute darkness feel like a slimy gelatinous sea slug that has been removed from all | |
| danger can feel the squinting contraction release in the same way that the sea slug we | |
| discussed in Chapter releases its gill The complete vacancy of visual stimulus will desensitize | |
| you and provide your eyes with the experience they need to grow wide This phenomenon is | |
| PROGRAM PEACE Self Care Exercises to Reprogram Your Mind and Body | |
| also a bit like eyestalk extension in snails When you touch a snail its eyestalks retract The eyes | |
| invert within the eyestalks and travel down toward the head This action blinds the snail but is | |
| an essential defensive reflex meant to protect the eyes After several seconds when the snail | |
| starts to feel safe again the eyes slowly evert the eyestalks reach full length and the eyes pop | |
| out at the top Use the exercises above to develop fearless wide eyes and fully extend your | |
| eayestalks | |
| In absolute darkness you will also be able to see phosphenes which are colored shapes | |
| that are produced by your visual system These may take the form of dots stars lines static | |
| circles or various other shapes This visual activity will be accentuated if you lightly rub your | |
| eyes The phosphenes represent a type of background noise that is usually not noticeable yet | |
| always ongoing When the lights are on phosphene activity is put to work helping you make | |
| perceptual distinctions When the lights are off that activity hits a stumbling block amounting | |
| to a lowlevel form of hallucination | |
| believe these phosphenes can play a role in driving anxious thought Notice when they | |
| flash abruptly and calm your reaction to this You may notice that they flare when you look | |
| straight keeping you from maintaining a fixed gaze You may also notice that they burst in the | |
| corner of your eye When they flash like this in the periphery of your vision believe they may | |
| be reminding you to scan for potential threats that are to the side of you or behind you When | |
| first started doing this the phosphene activity appeared sinister and frightening even saw | |
| flashes of scenes from horror movies This all contributed strongly to the feeling of being unsafe | |
| in the dark | |
| This may have also been the case for my cat Niko He cried like a kitten in the dark closet | |
| the first few times but now he will join me of his own volition Notice your reactions and try to | |
| bring peace to your conscious and unconscious responses to the phosphene activity by pairing | |
| the experience with diaphragmatic breathing After doing Exercise twice for five minutes | |
| never again saw any frightful apparitions strongly recommend that you use this technique to | |
| free the background activity of your visual system from unnecessary negativity | |
| Eye Exercise Vision in Complete Darkness | |
| Lie down on the floor in a pitchblack room Keep your eyes as wide as possible and observe | |
| your eye movements Practice looking in different directions and sustaining your gaze at | |
| different points with the eyes wide and eyebrows relaxed You will notice your eyes dart | |
| around in the dark They will display an intense agitated tendency to move quickly on their | |
| own without any conscious deliberation Simply observing this and practicing sustained | |
| gazing in utter blackness will allow you to reduce the intensity Nonjudgmentally monitor the | |
| visual activity colored phosphenes the eye movement activity and the feelings that come | |
| from being in utter darkness Use this method to dismantle your fear of the dark | |
| recommend buying noisereducing earmuffs to use in your dark closet With the earmuffs | |
| on you will be able to hear the background activity of your auditory system just as darkness | |
| reveals the background activity of your visual system For most of us background auditory | |
| function takes the form of a ringing or buzzing in the ears which is known as tinnitus When | |
| first heard the hissing sound amplified by the earmuffs it was very upsetting abhorred it | |
| Chapter Hold a Steady Upward Gaze with Wide Eyes | |
| Many people feel this way which is unfortunate because some degree of tinnitus is always | |
| there whether we are conscious of it or not found that the practice of breathing | |
| diaphragmatically and listening to my tinnitus gradually reduced its volume and made it far less | |
| emotionally disquieting Paced diaphragmatic breathing will quickly help you come to peace | |
| with being alone in complete darkness with nothing but the background noise of your own | |
| visual and auditory systems This will make it so that their default settings do not haunt you | |
| during everyday life | |
| Conclusion | |
| The final exercise puts several of the routines from this chapter together into a single routine | |
| that you can perform while watching television | |
| Eye Exercise Watching TV Upside Down | |
| Lie on the floor on your back with your head near the TV and your feet away from it Watch | |
| a movie or television program upside down so that you are looking straight up at the screen | |
| Your eyebrows should be visible but out of focus just below the bottom of the TVs border | |
| Do not allow your brow to raise Keep your eyes wide and your face relaxed Try to maintain | |
| constant eye contact with the characters on the television Place your breath metronome | |
| next to the TV so that it can guide you in paced diaphragmatic breathing Remain this way for | |
| the duration of a TV show or movie | |
| Afterward look in a mirror You should notice that your eyes look fuller happier and calmer | |
| Watching inverted video is also a challenge for your brains visual systems and may build | |
| cognitive and perceptual skills | |
| Some of these exercises may seem strange forced and almost comical Remember | |
| though that when you perform them you are coactivating behavioral subroutines not | |
| ordinarily coactivated together because of social constraints By pairing these with | |
| diaphragmatic breathing you reeducate your nervous system to treat them as safe making | |
| that combination of subroutines possible The more you do it the more probable it is to arise | |
| spontaneously in the future and eventually become a fixed part of your personality You will | |
| rarely have the opportunity to make prolonged eye contact looking up with wide eyes | |
| breathing diaphragmatically in the course of everyday life To build optimal behaviors into our | |
| repertoire we must create artificially ideal worlds in which to practice | |
| The next chapter widens our focus Behaviors like squinting looking down and glancing | |
| away all have muscular components to them Chapter discusses repetitive muscular strain in | |
| detail and considers the panoply of negative effects on us This will set the context for the rest | |
| of the book which will guide you to overcome it | |
| PROGRAM PEACE Self Care Exercises to Reprogram Your Mind and Body | |
| Chapter Bullet Points | |
| e Squinting eyebrow raising looking down and gaze aversion are forms of trauma that | |
| fracture our composure but can easily be rehabilitated | |
| e Widening your eyes relaxing your brow looking up and practicing a fixed gaze have | |
| many benefits and will literally change your perspective on life | |
| e Squinting is defensive and intended to protect the eyeballs On a fundamental level it is | |
| a sign of defensiveness or submission Deliberately widening the eyes can end excessive | |
| squinting and is especially easy to do when breathing long deep breaths | |
| e Raised eyebrows are analogous to the action of moving the ears backward in other | |
| mammals This action is performed by an animal being chased so that it can hear its | |
| attacker behind it It is submissive and so should not be strained for long periods | |
| e Eyebrows lowered is analogous to ears forward which is the posture for an animal | |
| chasing another This should not be strained either However becoming comfortable | |
| lowering your eyebrows into a full frown will increase your nonverbal dominance The | |
| same goes for glaring and the sideeye | |
| e Looking down is submissive and doing it habitually weakens the muscles that allow us to | |
| look up Looking upward above the horizon more often strengthens your ocular muscles | |
| and conditions your nervous system to stop casting your gaze toward the floor | |
| e Social trauma has caused us to become afraid of fixing our gaze on anything especially | |
| anothers eyes | |
| e Making prolonged eye contact with yourself in a mirror or simply gazing calmly at points | |
| in space will train your unconscious visual control systems to be comfortable | |
| maintaining a fixed gaze | |
| e After making eye contact look at or near the eye line rather than below it | |
| e Looking at characters on the TV straight in their eyes will strengthen your ability to look | |
| real people in the eyes | |
| e Speaking to someone on the telephone while making sustained wideeyed eye contact | |
| with yourself in a mirror will strengthen your facetoface rapport with others | |
| e Spending time in complete darkness while engaging in paced breathing will help you | |
| make your visual systems default activity less chaotic and frightening Using sound | |
| reducing earmuffs can do the same for your default auditory activity | |
| e Watching TV upside down can reinforce looking up and eyewidening | |
| Chapter Hold a Steady Upward Gaze with Wide Eyes | |
| Chapter Endnotes | |
| Pease B Pease A The definitive book of body language Bantam Books | |
| Lutz T Crying The natural and cultural history of tears Norton | |
| Hasson O Emotional tears as biological signals Evolutionary Psychology | |
| Even C Schrder C M Friedman S Rouillon F Efficacy of light therapy in | |
| nonseasonal depression A systematic review Journal of Affective Disorders | |
| Keating C F Human dominance signals The primate in us In S L Ellyson J F | |
| Dovidio Eds Power dominance and nonverbal behavior pp SpringerVerlag | |
| Keating C F Keating E G Visual scan patterns of rhesus monkeys viewing | |
| faces Perception | |
| Keating Human dominance signals | |
| ChevalierSkolnikoff S Facial expression of emotion in nonhuman primates | |
| In P Ekman Ed Darwin and facial expression A century of research in review pp | |
| Malor Books | |
| Trichas S Schyns B The face of leadership Perceiving leaders from facial | |
| expression The Leadership Quarterly | |
| Carney D R Hall J A A LeBeau L S Beliefs about the nonverbal expression of | |
| social power Journal of Nonverbal Behavior | |
| Tubbs S Human communication Principles and contexts th ed McGrawHill | |
| Hermann H R Dominance and aggression in humans and other animals The great | |
| game of life Academic Press | |
| Sapolsky R M The influence of social hierarchy on primate health Science | |
| Gomez J C Ostensive behavior in great apes The role of eye contact In A E | |
| Russon K A Bard S T Parker Eds Reaching into thought The minds of the great apes | |
| pp Cambridge University Press | |
| PROGRAM PEACE Self Care Exercises to Reprogram Your Mind and Body | |
| Cruz W Differences in nonverbal communication styles between cultures | |
| The LatinoAnglo perspective Leadership and Management in Engineering | |
| Sadri H A Flammia M Intercultural communication A new approach to | |
| international relations and global challenges Continuum International Publishing Group | |
| Knapp M L Hall J Nonverbal communication in human interaction th ed | |
| Cengage Learning | |
| Knapp Hall Nonverbal communication in human interaction | |
| Hogan K Stubbs R Cant get through barriers to communication | |
| Pelican Publishing Company | |
| Farroni T Csibra G Simion F Johnson MH Eye contact detection in humans | |
| from birth Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences | |
| Lohaus A Keller H Voelker S Relationships between eye contact maternal | |
| sensitivity and infant crying International Journal of Behavioral Development | |
| Van Edwards V Captivate The science of succeeding with people | |
| Penguin Random House | |
| Chance M R A Attention structures as the basis of primate rank orders | |
| Man | |
| Dovidio J F Ellyson S L Keating C F Heltman K Brown C E The | |
| relationship of social power to visual displays of dominance between men and women | |
| Journal of Personality and Social Psychology | |
| Dovido at al The relationship of social power to visual displays of dominance | |
| Nagasawa M Mitsui S En S Ohtani N Ohta M Sakuma Y Onaka T Mogi K | |
| Kikusui T Oxytocingaze positive loop and the coevolution of humandog bonds | |
| Science | |
| Tehovnik E J Slocum W M Carvey C E Schiller P H Phosphene induction | |
| and the generation of saccadic eye movements by striate cortex Journal of Neurophysiology | |
| Baguley D McFerran D Hall D Tinnitus The Lancet | |
| Chapter Recognize Muscular Tension | |
| and Dormancy | |
| You translate everything whether physical or mental or spiritual into muscular tension | |
| F M Alexander | |
| Suppose youre interacting with an abusive boss Without realizing it you hold some part of your body still in order | |
| to manage your behavior during the confrontation Tension in your jaw throat or shoulders keeps you from lashing | |
| out and losing your job Tension in your hips or feet keeps you from storming out of the room Similar tensions may | |
| arise when you deal with a relatives expectations of you or during a disagreement with a friend | |
| Mary Bond b | |
| This chapter discusses a form of trauma that transforms muscles on a cellular scale repetitive | |
| strain The first half of the chapter introduces the concepts of bracing and persistent muscular | |
| tension and explains how to recognize them in your own body The second half dives into the | |
| social and emotional aspects of muscle tension laying out the relationships between longterm | |
| strain pain breathing and submissiveness Exercises are offered throughout to aid you in | |
| recovering from your bodily tension | |
| Recognizing Excessive Muscular Tone | |
| It can be difficult to recognize the physical sensations of muscular strain We become so | |
| accustomed to the pain and discomfort that they become effectively imperceptible the same | |
| way we stop noticing unpleasant smells It often takes a significant shift for us to notice how | |
| our bodies really feel This happened to me after strained my shoulder skateboarding After | |
| the accident a doctor prescribed me a dozen pills of meloxicam a nonsteroidal anti | |
| inflammatory drug NSAID with analgesic effects After my first dose spent a few hours trying | |
| to analyze the effects of the drug My muscles felt looser and this quickly put me to sleep | |
| woke up in the middle of the night to feel my hamstrings burning intensely but they had | |
| not been stretched or exercised recently in any unusual way It took me a few minutes to | |
| realize that this pain was their normal baseline condition The strain had simply been unmasked | |
| by the NSAID drug had become utterly accustomed to the fact that this tension went to bed | |
| with me every night quickly realized that the problem was widespread My hamstrings were | |
| chronically strained from overzealous exercise but so were my hips lower back shoulders and | |
| neck That night as focused on gradually relaxing these body parts began to realize just how | |
| much had been clenching them in a bizarre contorted way | |
| This experience made me think of a lesson that my mother taught me In my twenties | |
| developed a condition called plantar fasciitis that causes pain in the soles of the feet She | |
| shared the method that she used to cure her plantar fasciitis saying something along these | |
| lines Jared its a medical disorder but it comes from tension You must be curling your feet | |
| into fists at night Right now you are unconscious of this tendency but it is possible to create | |
| awareness Each evening before you go to bed focus on the sensations in your feet and tell | |
| yourself that you plan to let the tension release and remain released as you sleep Dont allow | |
| your feet to remain clenched all night had painful plantar fasciitis for a full year yet after two | |
| nights of following her instructions meditating closely on the sensations of tension the pain in | |
| PROGRAM PEACE Self Care Exercises to Reprogram Your Mind and Body | |
| my feet was gone Right there lying in bed saw the connection and realized that this same | |
| lesson applied not only to my heels but to my hamstrings my heartache my headache | |
| and my whole body | |
| Tone Hypertonia and Hypotonia | |
| Muscle tone also referred to as residual muscle tension or tonus is a continuous and passive | |
| partial contraction found in all skeletal muscles It is often conceptualized as the muscles | |
| resistance to passive stretching during a resting state Muscles receive continuous innervation | |
| from the nervous system ensuring that even in rest they remain in a semiactive default state | |
| Thus there is no complete rest in living muscle tissue | |
| Both extensor and flexor muscles are constantly kept activated which helps us maintain | |
| muscle readiness For instance your bicep a flexor and triceps an extensor are both always | |
| in a state of partial contraction They complement and support each other no matter how | |
| much you try to relax them Muscles on opposite sides of a joint contract in unison to stabilize | |
| the joint This kind of antagonism occurs all over the body It is beneficial and necessary | |
| Muscle tone is normal but it can become too intense under certain conditions and begin to | |
| cause harm Excessive tone is referred to as persistent muscle tension muscle spasticity or | |
| hypertonia Hypertonic muscles can be found in crucial places throughout our bodies and are | |
| sources of chronic pain stiffness and premature frailty for every adult on the planet | |
| The cause of excessive muscular tone and the accompanying pain we experience is | |
| multifactorial Hypertonia can be exacerbated by bad habits wear and tear genetic risk factors | |
| and injuries such as car accidents and falls However most of the preventable muscular pain | |
| that we suffer is derived from a lowenergy injury to the tissues known as repetitive strain A | |
| repetitive strain injury is caused by repetitious tasks or by sustained awkward positions Almost | |
| any job profession or chore you can imagine involves monotonous contractions through which | |
| muscles are subject to continuous or nearcontinuous strain While repetitive strain may occur | |
| intermittently its effects build up over years resulting in chronic conditions | |
| Longstanding instances of muscular tension develop pathways in the nervous system that | |
| reinforce and perpetuate them Simultaneously an array of cellular changes takes place within | |
| muscle cells themselves forcing them to contract permanently forfeiting strength and | |
| flexibility By becoming accustomed to such burdens we force ourselves to carry them | |
| unknowingly This is how we come to feel the weight of the world on our shoulders We are all | |
| hauling an invisible intangible load forcing dozens of muscles throughout our body to push and | |
| pull against absolutely nothing | |
| Refrain from Muscular Bracing | |
| Excessive tension in any posture is called muscular bracing and it is pervasive We brace | |
| muscles all over our bodies every day Squinting and the raising and lowering of the brow | |
| discussed in Chapter are also forms of bracing Mostly we brace as a reflexive response to | |
| things that make us worried or uncomfortable Due to the false sense of security it can afford | |
| some researchers have termed it muscular armoring Bracing is intended to prepare us to | |
| quickly initiate offensive or defensive movements as when we protect the neck by keeping the | |
| shoulders raised Small amounts of temporary bracing are healthy and can be helpful during | |
| rough and tumble play contact sports falls or collisions Unnecessary bracing however | |
| Chapter Recognize Muscular Tension Dormancy | |
| keeps the body on guard and rigid Thus when you need to move you are forced to | |
| overcome your own resistance forfeiting grace and coordination | |
| Keeping our muscles tense makes us feel in control but is a dysfunctional coping tactic | |
| People generalize bracing from physical challenges to intellectual and social ones This is why | |
| some experts refer to instances of bracing as neurotic holding patterns For instance we | |
| tense during social encounters especially confrontational ones People tense their bodies | |
| during standardized tests social gatherings and public speaking This hinders their | |
| performance by interfering with productive efforts and by causing discomfort and autonomic | |
| stress As we will discuss in Chapter the sensation of fear in your gut and the sensation of | |
| having your heart in your throat are also manifestations of chronic bracing | |
| Imagine that you are standing alone in a strange dark parking lot with nothing nearby to | |
| grab ahold of You hear someone yell Brace yourself What pose do you strike Whatever | |
| pose you imagined is likely one that you commonly adopt during stress and startle The muscles | |
| responsible for this pose are the ones you brace most often and so they are likely currently in | |
| the process of becoming locked up Explore this a little further using the first unbracing | |
| activity below | |
| Relaxation Activity Making a Claw | |
| Tense all the muscles in your hand making it into a stiff claw Curl your fingers so that all | |
| fifteen knuckles are partially bent Keeping your hand in that formation see whether you can | |
| tense it even further Keep it tight as you open and close it five times | |
| Now use your imagination Try to feel what would happen to your hand if you were forced to | |
| hold it like this for a week straight It would become immobile inflamed and excruciating | |
| Consider how often you tense your hand in daily life Has it already taken a toll Going | |
| forward work on undoing that tension Try to notice the claw whenever it materializes and | |
| allow it to revert to a soft lithe hand | |
| You also want your hands to be strong so contracting their muscles firmly is necessary The | |
| important thing is that you allow them to relax deeply after you stop using them Make a | |
| very firm claw and then let it relax five times in a row How you respond to the discomfort | |
| involved in the effort makes all the difference Dont allow the discomfort from the | |
| contraction to influence you to keep bracing Rather plunge into the deeper level of | |
| relaxation that is available after you have brought the muscles to fatigue | |
| There are cyclical relationships between stress bracing and arthritis Some specialists | |
| refer to forms of bracing as prearthritic postures Joints can only be braced for so many years | |
| before they become inflamed and degenerative My mother has osteoarthritis in her hands | |
| Some of her knuckles are larger and more deformed than others She firmly believes that the | |
| most affected knuckles are those that she braced more during stress over decades An extreme | |
| example is the raisedarm babas of India These are men who for spiritual reasons have | |
| decided to always raise one arm in the air Over the years their shoulders become stiff as a | |
| PROGRAM PEACE Self Care Exercises to Reprogram Your Mind and Body | |
| board and completely useless As you look over the table below think about which bracing | |
| patterns you use | |
| Internal Facial Postural | |
| Tightening the Jaw Squinting the Eyes Raising the Shoulders | |
| Constricting the Throat Raising the Eyebrows Bracing the Lower Back | |
| Sucking the Tongue Straining the Smile Hunching the Neck | |
| Constricting the Nasopharynx Straining the Sneer Neglecting the Glutes and Abs | |
| Straining the Vocal Folds Pursing the Lips Bracing the Shoulder Blades | |
| Shallow Breathing Tightening the Cheeks Clenching the Hands and Feet | |
| Abdominal Tensing Drawing Down the Corners of Tilting the Pelvis to One Side | |
| the Mouth | |
| Table Common Forms of Bracing that Compromise Muscle and Cause Pain | |
| Bracing belongs to a more general category known as dysponesis or the misdirected use of | |
| energy in the musculoskeletal system of which unnecessary tensing of the muscles is just one | |
| example This wasting of energy is destructive For example dentists and orthodontists make | |
| particular note of jaw clenching teeth grinding and tongue tension because those movements | |
| push the teeth out of their optimal alignment In Chapter we will discuss how bracing the | |
| back pushes the spine out of alignment Muscular bracing is a factor in almost all joint disorders | |
| and is responsible for carpal tunnel temporomandibular joint disorder tennis elbow and | |
| countless others believe that most chronic injuries despite the fancy and distracting terms | |
| used by physicians start with tension caused by bracing | |
| One way a mammal remembers that it just glimpsed a predator is by crouching down and | |
| becoming very tense We often use muscular tension to keep something in mind When need | |
| to remember something or when there is an urgent need to do something that cannot be done | |
| right away become tenser The specific part of my body necessary to carry out the task is | |
| often where the tension manifests For instance will try to remind myself to write down a | |
| thought by tensing my fingers as if were gripping a pencil Recognize when this happens to you | |
| and try not to use tension as a mnemonic aid | |
| We tend to be negligent of excessive increases in muscle tension even when we are | |
| performing simple tasks We tighten muscles that are not involved in what we are doing and | |
| then keep those muscles tight even after we finish If the action is built into your job or daily | |
| routine you can start by improving the ergonomics of your workspace or taking more regular | |
| breaks You can also teach yourself to selectively calm muscles that you are not actively using | |
| for the task at hand The key is to constantly and creatively alter your body posture so that | |
| unused muscles are engaged and overused muscles are given a break | |
| Chapter Recognize Muscular Tension Dormancy | |
| Relaxation Activity Monitor Your Bracing During Teeth Brushing | |
| The next time you brush your teeth notice the movements in your hand arm shoulder | |
| neck face and torso Are you tensing muscles or expending energy that you dont need to | |
| For instance you might be gripping the toothbrush too tightly flexing heavily at the elbow or | |
| shoulder locking your jaw or craning your neck to one side Do you alter your posture and | |
| vary the repetitive motions to give your muscles breaks Use this activity as an example that | |
| you can extend to all your daily chores and rituals Generalize this experience to as many | |
| other activities as possible including writing with a pen typing with a keyboard or holding a | |
| phone tablet book remote controller or steering wheel | |
| Microbreaks Allow Muscles the Short Rests They Need | |
| Not all muscle tension is bad After all there is no way to exercise without tensing your | |
| muscles But bracing is very different from healthy exercise because it does not include tiny rest | |
| periods called microbreaks Sometimes all our muscles need is a few seconds or even just a | |
| few fractions of a second without being held taut When the electrical activity of muscle is | |
| tracked with electrodes these moments of downtime show up as electromyographic gaps | |
| brief intervals during which the muscles slacken and relax They are essential | |
| For example every step you take involves significant exertion as you push off against the | |
| ground However as one leg takes over the other is given a break during the time it takes to swing | |
| it forward again That respite allows the muscles to regenerate and prepare for the next step If | |
| you didnt have this microbreak after every step walking more than a few hundred meters would | |
| be difficult In much the same way all the muscles in your body require microbreaks | |
| Without momentarily reverting to a relaxed baseline tone muscles cannot replenish and | |
| unwanted processes ensue You have probably noticed the difference between fatigue caused | |
| by sustained bracing hyperfatigue and fatigue caused by exercise that contains microbreaks | |
| The former aches and is unpleasant while the latter is both soothing and exhilarating Indeed | |
| the most important factor in building healthy muscle is to allow it to relax The more relaxed | |
| your muscles are at rest the more quickly they recover from exercise This is why relaxed | |
| muscle responds dramatically to training whereas tense muscle responds sluggishly Whenever | |
| you are not using a muscle allow it to go limp It almost seems slothful but its not its the way | |
| you should live your life | |
| Intermittent breaks and rests can help you disrupt long periods of unnecessary rigidity | |
| Naps can work wonders in this regard During sleep and especially during REM sleep changes | |
| occur in brain signaling that cause vastly reduced muscle tone known as atonia This is one | |
| reason why short to minute naps can be so invigorating Short naps can also restore | |
| alertness mental performance and learning ability As you nap you are even giving your heart | |
| a brief rest which may be why naps have been associated with reduced coronary mortality | |
| Just remember that naps of minutes or more often lead to sleep inertia impaired alertness | |
| and tiredness When you feel depleted after the gym after an upsetting episode or whenever | |
| you start to feel stiff and sore set your phones timer for minutes and allow yourself a | |
| recuperative power nap Even if you dont fall asleep just giving yourself a few minutes to lay | |
| down during the day provides a reprieve that can be highly beneficial in the long term | |
| PROGRAM PEACE Self Care Exercises to Reprogram Your Mind and Body | |
| Why dont we allow ourselves the microbreaks that our bodies call for Often it is due to | |
| social pressures Propriety and intimidation related to the status hierarchy cause us to brace | |
| then feel guilty about relaxing Chronic submissive signaling disallows you from claiming the | |
| microbreaks that your muscles need When at a dinner date or in a board room we dont give | |
| our neurotic holding patterns a single second of downtime Wellcomposed people give various | |
| muscles involved in social displays microbreaks In fact we can conceptualize composure as skill | |
| in microbreaking Of course even our breathing muscles require microbreaks | |
| Unbrace Your Exhalation with the Passive Exhale | |
| Diaphragmatic bracing is the central feature of distressed breathing and a core symptom of | |
| trauma Remember Activity in which you held your hand like a claw and kept it tight as you | |
| opened and closed it This is exactly what you are doing with your diaphragm when stressed | |
| This kind of bracing could be an excellent exercise for the diaphragm if it only lasted for | |
| seconds at a time but we tend to do it for hours or days at a time Continuously overtensing | |
| the diaphragm and other respiratory muscles reduces their strength and range of motion | |
| resulting in rapid shallow breathing | |
| The inbreath requires muscular contraction but the outbreath does not It is not necessary | |
| to do any muscular work during exhalation The positive pressure of air in your lungs is enough | |
| to create the force This effortless return of the diaphragm to its resting position is called elastic | |
| recoil The air naturally wants to be pressed out of your lungs as it would from a deflating | |
| balloon Unfortunately most of us keep our breathing muscles tense during exhalation and this | |
| ensnares us in a state of fight or flight Stopping this requires awareness and practice To | |
| perform a passive exhalation all you need to do is let your breathing go limp while you are | |
| exhaling After a minute or two of practicing this you should actually be able to feel the | |
| diaphragm simmer down | |
| Relaxation Exercise Unbracing the Diaphragm While Exhaling | |
| Perform paced breathing for five minutes Take full inhalations and when you start each | |
| exhalation let go of the diaphragm completely Every exhalation should be a completely | |
| passive form of freefall throughout which all the breathing musculature is relaxed Imagine | |
| the leisurely descent of a parachute You are not doing any work at all and it should proceed | |
| at its own pace The air should be oozing out of your nostrils on its own Once you practice | |
| this for five minutes you should be able to tell that you were holding your diaphragm like a | |
| tense claw during your exhalation before Allowing the diaphragm to go limp during the | |
| exhale is extremely important for its health because just like all muscles it needs periods of | |
| inactivity to regenerate Because you never stop breathing its only chance for such a | |
| microbreak is during the exhalation | |
| Imagine that for some reason you are responsible for driving a car up and down a low | |
| grade hill over and over again For a while you keep the engine on during the descent but | |
| since the descent lasts for a few minutes you realize that you can turn the engine off put the | |
| car into neutral and just let it coast without having to touch the brake the accelerator or the | |
| Chapter Recognize Muscular Tension Dormancy | |
| wheel This is what a passive exhalation should feel like After you finish your inhale just take | |
| the keys out of the ignition | |
| Your inhalation is also braced it is just much harder to notice An inhalation requires the | |
| contraction of the diaphragm down into the gut to create the vacuum that draws air into the | |
| lungs But this contraction is often braced beyond what is necessary like the opening of a | |
| tightly clenched hand This bracing impedes belly breathing and pulls the air into your upper | |
| chest If you can interrupt it during an inhalation you will feel your belly coming uncoupled | |
| from the bottom of your rib cage The passive exhale will help you with this uncoupling As you | |
| learn to sense your diaphragmatic tension during the exhale you can teach yourself how to | |
| lessen the unnecessary tension occurring during the inhale Once you have done this your | |
| breathing will become much more efficient and less labored | |
| It is worth mentioning that aside from bracing the inhale during the exhale many of us also | |
| brace the exhale during the inhale This is when we keep the thoracic muscles responsible for | |
| exhalation clenched while breathing in This is also completely unnecessary Spend some time | |
| trying to notice these effects in your own breathing | |
| After performing the passive exhalation for a few days a sense of irritation in your chest | |
| will dissipate When this discomfort and inflammation is totally gone you will feel a profound | |
| sense of relief The passive exhalation is so important that consider it the fifth tenet of optimal | |
| breathing Expect it to increase the benefits you get from paced breathing The passive exhale is | |
| such a fundamental routine that it is actually a reflexive response that all mammals use after a | |
| stressor has come and gone Can you guess what it is | |
| Once a stressful episode has resolved all species of mammal exhibit deep spontaneous | |
| breaths They inhale very deeply so that they can then exhale passively to reset and restore | |
| equilibrium in their autonomic nervous system We know this as sighing Even mice sigh and | |
| believe that like us they do it to provide the diaphragm with a microbreak However if you | |
| provide your diaphragm with a microbreak during every exhalation you wont feel the need to | |
| sigh anymore The trick is to learn to exhale limply even after a shallow inhalation Sighing is | |
| very frequent in people diagnosed with panic disorders used to sigh constantly but after | |
| diaphragmatic retraining rarely catch myself doing it anymore Master the passive exhalation | |
| because it is highly detraumatizing | |
| Persistent Muscle Tension Creates Trigger Points | |
| Excessive muscle tension and the absence of microbreaks eventually produce knots that can | |
| be felt under your skin They occur all over the body They are often palpable raised nodules | |
| tender to the touch producing a dull aching pain when pressed firmly In the medical | |
| literature these knots are referred to as trigger points trigger sites or spasms and they cause | |
| reductions in muscle mass flexibility strength and endurance They are hyperirritated spots | |
| in taut bands of skeletal muscle fibers created by chronic muscle overload They usually involve | |
| a local contraction in a small number of muscle fibers within a larger muscle bundle | |
| Many scientists refer to these knots as myofascial trigger points The myo is derived | |
| from the Greek word for muscle while fascial refers to the tough outer lining that keeps | |
| muscles in place fascia is a type of connective tissue that forms a continuous scaffold around | |
| all the muscles and tendons in the body Myofascial trigger points are small patches of muscle | |
| and fascia that pull together in an isolated spasm They are different from wholemuscle | |
| PROGRAM PEACE Self Care Exercises to Reprogram Your Mind and Body | |
| spasms like a charley horse or cramp which are more transient have a sudden onset and | |
| involve hard contraction of the entire muscle Although they can contribute to cramping trigger | |
| points are different in that they are longlasting have a gradual onset and involve partial | |
| contractions in small portions of the muscle | |
| In addition to their immediate detrimental effects on muscle function trigger points often | |
| cluster together and pull on tendons and ligaments causing joint problems and deep pain | |
| The tension they cause at joints can result in clicking popping and grating sounds Over time | |
| they can contribute to bone spurs pinched nerves and arthritis Trigger points can be seen in | |
| greatly magnified pictures of muscle tissue like the one below They look like bunchedup | |
| distortions in a weblike matrix | |
| connective tissue | |
| Figure Knot of partially contracted sarcomeres in the muscle fiber from the leg of a dog at x magnification | |
| Compare with the normal sarcomeres above and below it This knot looks like an active contraction but has no | |
| electrical EMG activity and is thus stuck in partial contraction Reprinted with permission from Simons and | |
| Stolov | |
| Dr Janet G Travell MD is generally recognized as the leading pioneer in | |
| trigger point diagnosis and treatment It has been said that she singlehandedly created this | |
| branch of medicine Travell who was the White House physician during the Kennedy and | |
| Johnson administrations emphasized that trigger points are demoralizing and devastating to | |
| quality of life She called them the scourge of mankind Advancedstage trigger points are the | |
| worst They usually present in clusters are the most painful and involve highly warped muscle | |
| fibers with large numbers of molecular aberrations In reality most people are practically | |
| covered in trigger points from old injuries bad posture poor workout techniques and bracing | |
| Muscle Tension Develops at the Molecular Level | |
| To better understand trigger points we need a little more background on muscles themselves | |
| Muscles are composed of fibers which are themselves made of smaller fibers The thinnest of | |
| Chapter Recognize Muscular Tension Dormancy | |
| those hold sarcomeres in which contraction takes place A sarcomere is a microscopic structure | |
| built from two kinds of filamentlike molecules actin and myosin Actin and myosin form | |
| interdigitating strands that can be activated When active they move past each other quickly | |
| creating contractile force | |
| Fascicle Fiber Myofibril all | |
| I | |
| Ui | |
| ml a a | |
| illustration A Muscle made of fibers containing sarcomeres B Microscopic view of contracted sarcomeres in | |
| a muscle myofibril An actual trigger point may contain dozens of these tiny knots | |
| Millions of sarcomeres must contract to perform even the smallest movement After they | |
| contract the sarcomeres relax when their actin and myosin strands are uncoupled from each | |
| other and pull apart In healthy muscle actin and myosin wait patiently in a relaxed decoupled | |
| state until an impulse from the nervous system tells them to pull past each other again In | |
| unhealthy muscle they are stuck Many specialists believe that trigger points start to form | |
| when overuse causes actin and myosin to become fixed in an interlocked position This | |
| interlocking puts the muscle into a static state of contracture in which the strands no longer | |
| separate and relax | |
| Relaxation Actin | |
| ele ACTIN | |
| Contraction | |
| Illustration A Relaxed sarcomere on top and a contracted sarcomere on the bottom with actin and myosin | |
| visible B Myosin curls like a finger pulling on actin and allowing them to slide past each other to create muscular | |
| movement C Human neck and shoulders covered with clusters of trigger points | |
| PROGRAM PEACE Self Care Exercises to Reprogram Your Mind and Body | |
| Trigger points originate from a few different sources sustained lowlevel contraction | |
| sudden muscle overload eccentric contraction when a muscle stretches and contracts | |
| simultaneously and gross trauma or injury to the muscle Regardless of the cause trigger | |
| points slow blood flow to the muscle and cause oxygen deprivation at the affected site | |
| The reduced blood flow then causes sarcomeres to contract further constricting the | |
| surrounding capillaries Capillaries normally supply the muscle with blood so when they | |
| constrict it leads to reduced circulation or ischemia that impairs many cellular processes | |
| Without blood flow chemical waste products from muscular activity start to accumulate | |
| Eventually the waste stimulates pain receptors in nearby nerve endings sending pain signals to | |
| the brain Active trigger points demonstrate an unusual biochemical mix not seen in healthy | |
| tissue It is an acidic milieu containing increased levels of proinflammatory contractile and | |
| paincausing substances And remember we draw our very breaths with muscles that are | |
| affected by these symptoms | |
| Muscle Shortening and Scar Tissue | |
| A muscle can change its resting length to adapt to the length at which it is habitually used or | |
| positioned Muscles usually become shorter due to prolonged contracture This is known as | |
| adaptive muscle shortening and places the muscle in a state of partial contraction It is another | |
| pervasive clinical finding that affects every person who has ever lived | |
| People confined to long periods of sitting exhibit debilitating shortening of the lower back | |
| and hip muscles especially the hip flexors Similarly wearing highheeled shoes causes | |
| prolonged plantar flexion of the foot which results in adaptive shortening of the soleus | |
| muscles Constant squinting shortens the muscle fibers of the orbicularis oculi narrowing the | |
| eyes Straining the sneer causes the muscles that lift the top lip to shrink making the face | |
| appear hideous When the muscles in your knees and ankles shorten they leave you vulnerable | |
| to sprains and tears Holding a hunched neck posture leads to shortening of the | |
| sternocleidomastoid and other muscles in the front of the neck making it very difficult to stop | |
| hunching because the decreased length of these muscles pulls the head down As Chapter | |
| will explain bracing the muscles surrounding the genitals may play a role in sexual dysfunction | |
| There are examples of adaptive muscle shortening in muscles all over our bodies | |
| The pressure from prolonged contracture pulls on tendons straining them and distressing | |
| the joints when they move Next ligaments and joint capsules retract These changes perturb | |
| nerve endings within the muscles and joints causing deepseated pain Muscle shortening also | |
| increases wear and tear contributing to inflammatory and degenerative changes such as | |
| tendonitis fasciitis bursitis and osteoarthritis Many different tissue types are damaged by | |
| strain including articular cartilages connective tissues tendons fascia menisci ligaments and | |
| spinal disks | |
| Adaptive muscle shortening can be made worse by the accumulation of scar tissue Scar | |
| tissue is a very tough inflexible fibrous material that binds itself to strained muscle fibers | |
| attempting to draw the damaged fibers together The result is a bulky mass of stiff tissue | |
| surrounding the site In some cases it is possible to feel and even see this mass under the skin | |
| When scar tissue adheres to muscle fibers it prevents them from sliding back and forth | |
| properly limiting the flexibility of a muscle or joint | |
| Chapter Recognize Muscular Tension Dormancy | |
| Scar tissue tends to shrink and deform the surrounding tissues diminishing strength and | |
| making the body feel heavy It tends to adhere to nerve cells leading to chronic pain Existing | |
| research has found that scar tissue is weaker less elastic more prone to future reinjury and | |
| up to times more painsensitive than normal healthy tissue This results in chronic pain | |
| that under most circumstances lasts a lifetime In people who brace the most these effects | |
| create visibly apparent postural distortions | |
| Excessive Tension is Debilitating and Constrains Your Physique | |
| Muscles encumbered by trigger points and adaptive shortening can be conceptualized as | |
| dormant muscles This is so because they are difficult to recruit dont move with the rest of the | |
| body and are starved of blood Dormant muscles cannot recover adequately after a workout | |
| and are resistant to growth and strengthening because they can never fully relax and thus can | |
| never fully heal As long as they are under constant selfimposed strain they will continue to | |
| grow harder more fragile and decrepit Scrunchedup muscles crumple your body and cause it | |
| to buckle under every movement | |
| Pregnancy itself does not necessarily adversely affect a womans physique Rather it is the | |
| months of prolonged bracing absence of postural variety and limited range of motion that can | |
| accompany the later stages of pregnancy for some women that have prominent longlasting | |
| effects Moreover although some of the natural variation in physique between humans is due | |
| to exercise genetics and exposure to testosterone much of it can be attributed to differences | |
| in dormant muscle that arose due to bracing during stress | |
| You have significant untapped reservoirs of muscle in your body that correspond to areas | |
| you brace and have been bracing for decades For example think about the hunch you probably | |
| have in your neck Starting at birth you had a natural tendency to straighten the cervical | |
| vertebrae in your neck stacking them in a straight line That straightnecked upright posture is | |
| optimal But social pressures can affect how we carry our heads and necks the less safe stable | |
| or welcoming your childhood environment was the more you were conditioned to hunch over | |
| communicating modesty or submission The standard submissive neck posture is to stoop over | |
| jut your chin out and tilt your head back All of those changes reduce your height and help you | |
| appear guarded But they also introduce a slant in your neck which is an inefficient way of | |
| stacking vertebrae against the force of gravity The excessive tension that develops leads to the | |
| proliferation of trigger points and those in turn cause muscle dormancy in your neck | |
| shoulders and chest and from there on down the spine | |
| Chapter will detail exactly how to reclaim your neck and regain its flexibility and full | |
| range of motion But the neck is just one example of a reservoir of muscle that has been | |
| suppressed that you can tap into These reservoirs can be found all over our bodies Take your | |
| clothes off and look in the mirror Any body parts that dont appear nubile and supple have | |
| great potential If all of our muscles were brought completely out of dormancy we would have | |
| the physiques if not bulk of elite athletes | |
| Injuries Lead to Muscular Bracing | |
| Injuries contribute to and interact with bracing After getting hurt individuals often try to avoid | |
| experiencing pain by tensing the area surrounding the site of injury When someone sprains | |
| their ankle they unintentionally contract many muscles in the ankle setting it in a fixed | |
| PROGRAM PEACE Self Care Exercises to Reprogram Your Mind and Body | |
| defensive position This is intended to protect the injury In fact it is known as splinting | |
| because it acts as a splint to immobilize the joint Unfortunately it also deprives the muscles of | |
| the rest oxygen and nutrients they need to heal As a result splinting worsens the pain in the | |
| long term by overtaxing the muscles involved This happens partly because we tend to breathe | |
| extremely shallowly whenever we injure ourselves because as you know shallow breathing | |
| causes bracing This is why whenever experience an injury pull out my breath metronome | |
| immediately | |
| Injuries almost always result in some form of persistent muscle tension Even major | |
| medical procedures can contribute atrogenic pain is a term referring to pain caused by | |
| medical treatment and is especially common with the use of braces slings casts and surgeries | |
| Immobilizing a broken forearm with a cast can easily lead to frozen shoulder syndrome in | |
| which a group of deltoid muscles is barred from moving through its normal range of motion as | |
| tension gradually mounts | |
| had a melanoma removed from my shoulder blade in my midteens and recently found | |
| that have a series of muscular knots under the scar from bracing the area My brother | |
| received a large shot in the quadriceps during his appendectomy years ago and he says the | |
| same area troubles him often Think conscientiously about past injuries medical procedures | |
| and other forms of trauma identifying how they might be causing you to brace or tense | |
| muscles even today | |
| Stress and muscular tension also make us more susceptible to physical injury because tense | |
| muscles fail and tear under excessive force whereas relaxed ones are more resilient The | |
| muscles strained by sitting in a fixed position at a computer for eight hours a day are the most | |
| susceptible to damage from a fall or car accident Thus injury can lead to bracing and bracing | |
| can lead to reinjury | |
| Tense muscle tissue can be conceptualized as an injury or as a trauma even if there was no | |
| precipitating accident The word injury is defined as physical damage to a biological organism | |
| The word trauma is defined as an abnormality in an organisms tissues usually caused by | |
| injury By these definitions any form of persistent bracing and the trigger points stemming | |
| from it are both injurious and traumatic Unfortunately once they get bad enough they can | |
| poison us emotionally | |
| The Link Between Tension Pain and Negative Emotion | |
| These mountains that you are carrying you were only supposed to climb Najwa Zebian b | |
| Physical pain is an adaptive evolved mechanism The pain from a cut or burn informs us that | |
| our bodies are suffering damage It gives us builtin motivation to withdraw from the source of | |
| harm and learn to avoid it in the future But what about muscular pain also known as myalgia | |
| In contrast to physical pain myalgia has more to do with restricting movement It compels us to | |
| refrain from specific motions that might be damaging or harmfulit tells us not to overstretch | |
| a strained muscle not to bend a weakened joint too far It also tells us when we approach the | |
| limits of our healthy range of motion giving us important feedback about what our bodies can | |
| and cannot do This would have restricted aging huntergatherers from movements that had | |